Appropriate Time
Posted: May 22, 2009 at 11:29 pmLife around these parts has not been normal for 5 days now. Yes it is this gross at times. Masks required
The dog Sug(er) has been hovering and protecting all the sick and dying. The cats seem to care also.
When they are up and walking this is what my floor ends up looking like. The towels you see have been there for 2 days covering the puke. I finally cleaned them up today. There were/are more throughout the house.
This is what my poor babies look like when they have just barfed and are too spent to do anything else. Rest wee one rest.
There is an appropriate time for anything and everything. That does not mean the subject matter must be appropriate to someone elses liking.
It is approriate that my home be a total disaster right now.
It is approriate that my children just be allowed to cry.
It is appropriate that they play nakey in the back yard pool if they so desire.
It is approriate that my kids forage for food in the well stocked fridge without help from me.
It is appropriate that I not be able to blog like I want to or go to the gym like i need to, right now.
It is appropriate that I not get a shower everyday.
It is appropriate that i yell.
It is approriate to hide in my closet even for a moment from the screaming people.
It is appropriate to say FUCK off to any and all rude and selfish mother fuckers that cross my path because normally I am full of patience and forgiveness but right now I am appropriately stripped down to my bare and raw abilities.
I am appropriately different from my average daily self. Its an interesting trip to be on. That is how I try to think of it. Im not in a permanent state off affairs….OH NO. This is temperary, this is just a test of my will and determination to return back to my wonderful loving self, when all around me returns to its normal state of course.
I have been telling others for years that they too are OK being different from there normal selves for a period of time when life throws them a curve ball. So I must accept its ok for me too.
The Discussion
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I love you, Tonya. And even more than that, I love the grace you are giving yourself right now.
Rock on, sister.
I don’t know if I would have allowed some of those things to be appropriate for me. I give myself a hard time and I want to be sweet and patient even when I want to tell people to fuck off. It’s nice to see another mom give herself that grace so that I may learn to give myself that grace. Thanks!
awww thanks ladies. I caught myself losing my mind last night. woke up this morning realizing the only reason i was losing anything was because i was pressuring myself to be on my top game. I have to learn to change what my top game is according to how the other players are playing I guess.
I give you props man you are an awesome Mommy with many patience.